The Shake - repost

Picture this. I have been painting the house all week and weekend, using every available moment to grab a brush. I walked into the shop to get a large can of acrylic white I'd left there. As I walk into the shop I make a bee-line around the junk laying everywhere and make one small mistake - I tread on the shop-dog's tail. The dog, a solid two year old Lab, leaps up howling and lifts the card table she's under. The paint I am looking for was on the card table, now it is everywhere and running all over the shop-dog's back. Shop-dog gets that bath-time look and I know she is about to shake, so I yell "NOOooooo" and make a grab for her. I slip on the paint and crash down in a heap on the floor in the paint, sawdust and shavings.
The dog gets 'the look' again and there's not a thing I can do about it. I watch as she lowers her nose at me and the lips begin to twitch, the eyes go into squint mode and the jowls begin to wobble and finally her head starts 'the shake'. The paint flies from her head to the roof, walls, tool cabinets, windows - everywhere! The 'shake' moves to her neck and back as I get to my feet and start bellowing at her. She tries to move away but is mid-shake, and only manages a half-turn, this is just sufficient to aim at the remaining unpainted areas of the shop. A full gallon and a half is thrown all over the shop, what can't get onto benches hits the roof, then falls onto benches. Drillpresses, sawbench, electrical tools, open cupboards and drawers, she gets the lot. I try to dive again and miss, instead hitting the Sears toolboxes which begin to move quickly across the floor until they hit the expansion crease - and stop dead - at least the wheels do anyway. The three cabinets lean right over and fall, crashing into the TS and dropping their contents all over the floor into the paint, spanners, sockets, screwdrivers - every darn handtool I own.
At this point I roar out "get the f*@# outta here" and hear SWMBO saying "Greg, it's all right". "Bull*#@!" says I, as I struggle with something pinning me down. I slowly realise I am pinned by a sheet, and become aware that I am in bed, dry, and it's the middle of the night. SWMBO asks why I was yelling at Sally (shop-dog), and what did she do? For my part, I tell the kids to go back to bed and promise to tell SWMBO in the morning. I should have told her as soon as we got up, because she has been reading this over my shoulder as I type it in, and now I have coffee down my back.
Brains are treacherous things guys, never switch 'em off - they'll turn on ya.
Add pictures here
<% if( /^image/.test(type) ){ %>
<% } %>
<%-name%>
Add image file
Upload
snipped-for-privacy@hotmail.com says...

... snip OK

Yeah, well, thanks, I have water all over my screen now. At least it wasn't tea this time. :-)
Hilarious story.

Add pictures here
<% if( /^image/.test(type) ){ %>
<% } %>
<%-name%>
Add image file
Upload
Good one, dude!
--
*Think thrice, measure twice and cut once.
*Sanding is like paying taxes ... it has to be done, but it is
  Click to see the full signature.
Add pictures here
<% if( /^image/.test(type) ){ %>
<% } %>
<%-name%>
Add image file
Upload
clean up the shop or it may happen,funny story all the same
says I, as I struggle with something

this
Add pictures here
<% if( /^image/.test(type) ){ %>
<% } %>
<%-name%>
Add image file
Upload
brought forth from the murky depths:

"...and I'd never seen Sally fly before, but there she was, looking down at me through those big, sullen eyes from the attic opening..."
Happy Holidays, big guy.
========================================================= I drank WHAT? + http://www.diversify.com --Socrates + Web Application Programming
Add pictures here
<% if( /^image/.test(type) ){ %>
<% } %>
<%-name%>
Add image file
Upload

HomeOwnersHub.com is a website for homeowners and building and maintenance pros. It is not affiliated with any of the manufacturers or service providers discussed here. All logos and trade names are the property of their respective owners.