I would tell them "Nope ... I busted my tail for you and you made me pay for my own sandwich. I expect better from my friends and until you are willing to show me more consideration I can't consider you my friends."
If you don't tell them what's wrong, they'll never guess. As it is they will likely express something along the line of "Well, we're sorry you took it that way."
Speak. Use the exit. Let them either find another chump or reach for their checkbooks.
I do discount my prices to friends ... unless they ask for a discount based on their friendship. Then it's "full retail plus 20%".
If it were me, I would run (not walk) away from that job. If you've been around doing that kind of work, you surely know someone who you can trust to do them a good job. Recommend someone else and remain friends if you care to.
Here's another look at this old problem. Many will take your labor and efforts for granted, and accept all the "help" they can get. Tell them you are doing this FOR MONEY, because if you weren't, you would be working on your own house. Educate them on what your time is worth to you, and how you don't want to spend every weekend at their house unless there is $$ involved.
With one of my friends, we trade out work at each other's full retail. Once he thought he got the short end of the stick, so he had someone else do the work he wanted. Fine with me. Sadly, he got screwed. (OK, I did enjoy that just a little...) Now we are back on the rail and everything works smoothly.
I work for my family, too. I charge them $40 an hour for labor only, including picking up material they can't get delivered. I also require lunch. Since we had the ground rules set out up front, they don't complain. They listen to all their friends whine about how they are getting pissed off at their remodeling contractor and they feel like they are getting a pretty good deal with me.
They are happier paying me than any other arrangement. We kept hours of who did what and built a bank of hours, and they decided that it was OK to pay me for working in their house. When it came to my turn to cash in the hours, I got a load of top soil to spread and we worked on trimming my huge ash trees. Strangely... they preferred the cash arrangements...
This makes no sense. The senario is their car/house, they buy the material to make a fix. I flat out refuse to subsidise someone else's car or house. I supply 'some' labor to help them do the fix. Where does the payment in full come in?? Perhaps it's the worn parts and extra gaskets left behind, oil and debris on the floor that doesn't get swept up at job's end, wear and tear on tools, cost of electricity and heat that some how got turned into payment
He was quite indignant that I would ask him to do work for me while at the same time I did work for him . This was a discussion about trading time for time. He didn't come over here to work, he came over here to get a free ride. He had no intention of even helping me help himself.
Moral to this story is there is no moral. Help those that help you and themselves while you are helping them. Whiney moochers pay their own way. Favors given should not require discussion. I am not Don Corleone looking for future considerations and this not contract law. Want a favor - give a favor.
Unless you REALLY need the money, find a way to pass... They walked on you once, they'll stomp you this time, because when you pay for something, you buy the right to bitch...
Something they told us in the Army... "The 1st drop of rain that hits you is God's fault, after that, it's yours"... Mac
I often take people flying in my small plane. It actually does run on "thanks", and even better on smiles. The bigger the smile, the more octane it's got! I only invite people with whom I expect to enjoy their company. If they offer something, that's very nice. Otherwise, I've spend some priceless time with them.
I learned a long time ago that sharing toys and unique skills (kind of like a giving a gift) is much more enjoyable when I expect nothing in return.
If I'm expecting a passenger to share costs, or a woodworking customer to pay me, we discuss all the details ahead of time.
There's a lot of wisdom been given here. Placing them at the top of your "ex-friend" list is a good approach. Because I'm the type of person I am I would be tempted to take another tack. Agree a reasonable price, get them to pay out for all the materials, start the job, create a big mess, and as soon as they start niggling at you just pack your tools up, say "Finito, Benito!" and walk away. Let them try to find a jobber who will take over someone else's incomplete project.
I like that answer. It's either friends or an arms-length relationship, but can't be both. I've been in similar circumstances, providing sophisticated spreadsheets and other computer programs. For me, I won't charge for my time because I'm not a computer professional and can't/won't warranty my work. Neither would I guarantee my woodwork. Once you start getting paid for something, you have an obligation to (a) do it right, (b) do it professionally, and (c) fix it when necessary. Regards --
I still do work for free for (actually with) my friends. Friends helping friends is a great thing in my opinion. I would never charge my friends for anything. But, I do not think I have any "friends" that would treat me as you have described so I cant really comment on your situation. I'm slowly finishing my basement and I asked a friend to help. He did, We worked together. He got a beer or two, some food and we had a good time working together. He even bought a new tool belt on his way over. I expect I will help finish his basement or deck in the future. I will do so gladly. I even did a drive by of his house while he was on vacation to see if his lawn needed mowed. No, he didn't ask me. Its just what friends do!
I have very old cottage in a campground with other very old cottages. The sound of a power tool brings all the men together to help out. If I was working on something on my cottage I would not even need to ask, I would have help quick enough. If I was free and I head someone working on their cottage I would be over with tools in hand, no questions asked.
There is a flip side of course. If the guy was not friendly, not willing to help out on other peoples projects, or didn't contribute to the good of the campground I would be a little reluctant to just jump in without being asked. If asked I would probably help anyone, friends or not, if they were in need.
"Long story short~ Remodeled basement for longtime friends,"
I would ask this longtime freind to help you with some painting or yard work. If they give you labor in return i dont think you need to equate the labor rates of skilled VS unskilled. Hauling brush at your house is just as valuable as your skilled carpentry even if the real world has different rates for the two jobs (amonst friends.)
I just had that situation come up last night... I had a neighbor pick a pen last week for her birthday... sort of a personal thing, but it's hard for me to decide what pen someone else might like, because I seldom think one is good enough.. *g*
Anyway, she asked last night if I'd sell her one that she liked, so that she could give it to her sister for HER b-day... I threw it in a plastic case and told her that it was a compliment to me that someone liked a pen that much, and please take it as a gift... She said that it wasn't fair that I should be giving her a 2nd pen, and insisted on paying for it... Not wanting to try explaining that I really don't like selling to friends and that the damn thing cost less than $4 to make, I just said "Ok, that one's $250"...
After the shock and the laughter, she decided that free was better...
I prefer the looks of the straight tailed version myself. From what I understand, the "killer" part of the plane is totally undeserved for any qualified pilot willing to actually do weight and balance calculations. Along with the "Dr. Killer", the Bo also has a very large following of satisfied pilots and owners. Many higher-performance private planes are easier to load tail heavy than a typical trainer. Mooneys, Cherokee Sixes, Cessna 210's etc... all can be more difficult to fly than your typical 172, Cherokee, or Musketeer.
I think the next excellent plane to get an undeserved "Dumb Dr." reputation is the Cirrus SR22. A few folks have managed to panic and deploy the "ballistic recovery parachute" during perfectly do-able power-off landings. Once the parachute is deployed, directional control is lost. Even without power, a piston single can land easily on suitable terrain. One guy managed to pass up a power-off landing on flat, wide open desert in favor of a parachute landing into an oil refinery.
Our Sundowner is actually nose-heavy. With two decent size adult males in the front row and an empty back row, we end up carrying 100+ pounds of water ballast in the rear baggage area. With rear seat passengers it all comes together nicely without ballast.
In 2001, I had a co-worker stall and spin a Cherokee 6 at takeoff. The accident killed all 6 aboard. The NTSB investigation determined he was right at the gross weight and aft CG limits on a hot, humid day.
HomeOwnersHub website is not affiliated with any of the manufacturers or service providers discussed here.
All logos and trade names are the property of their respective owners.