Rational concerns about economic data

[Jim Mc Namara]

It's amazing how I've had 3 ex's - each one got a cheek cut - and there were only two at birth! LOL!

Jums

[george]

nope not amazing just a man thing! we all got ex's and we all got screwed. at least we got kissed once or twice before the screwin started. if she's smiling while walkin down the isle RUN AS FAST AS YER FEET CAN MUSTER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! if ya look back you'll just get screwed again. george

[Jim Mc Namara]

I guess with squarefingers - you need all the help you can get! Reminds me of the eulogy of the Pillsbury dough boy.

No one knew how badly he was kneaded until after he was gone. It was a great service - Mrs. Butterworth lead the congregation in a song, Uncle Ben delivered the message, it was catered by Chef Boyardee, and they all gathered around at 3:50 for 30 minutes.

Oh God - why did I go there? :-)

Jums

[george]

leave the doughboy outta this i'm married to his fat sister. george

[Jim Mc Namara]

There ought to be a federal fund that men who have been screwed over by a spouse (and honest to God *didn't* deserve it) should be able to get monthly payments from. And PLEEZE let's not make this a political thread!!!

The first thing my ex's attorney asked her was:

"Has he ever hit you?" She was honest enough to tell her no . . . "he wasn't that kind of man."

"Did he ever threaten you?" "No - I said he wasn't that kind of man."

"Did he keep the family funds out of your reach?" "No - he gave me everything I ever wanted - a new car - new furniture - we were about to buy a new house when I left."

"Why are you wanting a divorce?" "I dunno . . . "

Go figure!

Jums

[Jim Mc Namara]

I heard she was under the weather . . . another "yeast" infection?

LAMOJ!

Jums

[Jim Mc Namara]

Less filling - and bought by somebody else so it's free! Top that dog!

Jums LOL!

[george]

hehehehe at least it aint a bun in the oven! george

[george]

does it come in 13 packs?

[george]

but it might be a zucinny!hmmmm......... spelling the other vegtable! george

[Ernie Jurick]

A farmer walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for divorce. The attorney asked, "May I help you?"

The farmer said, "Yep. I wanna git me one of them dee-vorces."

The attorney asked, "Well, do you have any grounds?"

The farmer replied, "Yep. I got me about a hunnert forty acres o' good bottom land."

The attorney said, "No, you don't understand. Do you have a case?"

The farmer said, "Nope, I don't got a Case, but I got me a nice John Deere."

The attorney said, "No you don't understand, I mean do you have a grudge?"

The farmer said, "Yep, I got a grudge. That's where I park my John Deere."

The attorney said, "No, sir, I mean do you have a suit?"

The farmer said, "Yes, sir, I got me a suit. I wear it to church on Sundays and to funerals."

The exasperated attorney said, "Well, sir, does your wife beat you up or anything?"

The farmer said, "No, sir, we both get up 'round about 4:30."

Finally, the attorney asked, "Okay, let me put it this way. WHY DO YOU WANT A DIVORCE?"

And the farmer replied, "Well, I can never have a meaningful conversation with her!"

-- Ernie

[B a r r y B u r k e J r .]

I figured it wood.

Barry

[george]

lmao

[Norman D. Crow]

Sorry, couldn'r resist! Nahmie

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"

She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by."

"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

"It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she responded.

"I mean," he continued, "What are your relations like?"

"I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents."

He said, "Do you have a real grudge?"

"No," she replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one."

"Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?"

"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes."

"Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?"

"Yes," she responded, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do."

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?"

"Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce.

My husband does. He said he can't communicate with me."

[Jack-of-all-trades - JOAT]

Fri, Jul 11, 2003, 2:02pm [e-mail] (alexy) squats and dumps on us: Those of us

This crap is posted on rec.woodworking, why?

JOAT Let's just assume you don't know what the Hell you're talking about.

Life just ain't life without good music. - JOAT Web Page Update 25 Jun 2003. Some tunes I like.

[Dave Balderstone]

Nuff said.

djb

[Alex]

Seems to me youse are playing soggy biscuit coz I wooden have a glue wotcha ya on about!

[Traves W. Coppock]

On Fri, 11 Jul 2003 21:05:28 GMT, "Jim Mc Namara" Crawled out of the shop and said. . .:

*sniff* no one loves me but my dog...and i gotta bribe his ass with a bone. . .

Traves "I'm through". . .

*G*

[Traves W. Coppock]

On Fri, 11 Jul 2003 20:20:43 GMT, "Jim Mc Namara" Crawled out of the shop and said. . .:

ROFL

Heard a comedian on the radio recently

"I hate divorce, so I'm never going to get married again. I'll just find a woman i cant stand to be in the same room with, and give her a house"

Traves

[alexy]

No problem. I'll call in the order now. Stop by the house between 6 and 6 tonight for all you can eat and drink.