OT: Lost a dear friend, very skilled accountant and above all, my dad.

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My math was off, married for 66 years!!
Thank you all for the responses, we appreciate it very much.
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Robatoy wrote:

I'm sorry to learn of your loss. None of us will live forever; my dad only made it to 72. I'll always remember something the pastor said around that time. He said that people live on in at least 3 ways: In our memories, in what they built (including family), and through what they taught others. It has been both a source of peace and understanding to me to observe that he was right. It sounds like your mother is the one who will most need the extra efforts from you and your other family members who can help. I wish you all of the extra strength that you'll need.
Bill
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When those, close to me or whom I have come to know, have such a loss, I, in my own quiet way, am often transfixed with their loss, their descriptions of their loved one and what that person meant to them. I try to learn, through their words, what, exactly, it is they have lost and I, somehow, try to feel it for myself. I lost my dad when I was nine. It is times as these that I wish I had such memories as yours. There is a portrait of my dad that commands a wall, all for himself, in my old shop. I have often wished he could see me now. I think he would be proud.
I give a well deserved slatute to your Dad, Rob.
Sonny
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Somehow, we all want our dads to be proud of us. As my accountant, there were the odd years that he was <G>
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On Sat, 21 May 2011 08:32:31 -0700, Robatoy wrote:

My condolences to you and your family, there is not much else one can say.
Me and Swmbo rescue a lot of animals personally, I'll dedicate one for him.
basilsik
--
A wink is as good as a nod to a blind horse

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On Sat, 21 May 2011 08:32:31 -0700 (PDT), Robatoy

Dads are hard to lose, I know. Condolences on your loss, Toy. Remember the good times.
-- The great thing about getting older is that you don't lose all the other ages you've been. -- Madeleine L'Engle
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When I woke up this morning, I was missing my dad, who died a little over three years ago (at 89 yr., 3 da.). There've been many times since I've found myself thinking, "Hey, Dad would like that!" or, "Bet Dad would find that as funny as I do..." In short, I've got a pretty good idea what you're experiencing.
Enjoy the memories.
Peace.
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My most sincere condolences to you and your family.
While we do now know each other - I follow this group regularly and very much enjoy and learn from your posts.
Making it to almost 90 is no small accomplishment - amazing all the inventions and history your dad experienced.

Will do.
Sincerely,
Doug Hortvet
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Sorry for your loss....
shelly
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"Robatoy" wrote:

My thoughts are with you and yours.
Lew
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Not much to say, really. It all sounds too pat.
So I will give you my Dad's take (85) on this subject. If your father had a good life, enjoyed himself and his family and didn't suffer too much, he did just fine. Sounds like he knocked it out of the park to me.
I am sorry for your loss and hope you can keep the good thoughts in your mind when you think of him. You know you have friends down here in Texas, and we are thinking of you and yours.
Robert
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Speaking of which, how are your parents doing these days?
Lew
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As good as they can, I guess. They just found a malignant growth on my Dad's face and removed it, and he now has a hold the size of a nickel just under his cheekbone that oozes all day long. A specialist will look at it to see if they need to cut more off, or to have chemo/ radiation (that won't happen). He is now completely confined to his wheelchair, and has lost most of his dexterity. He is almost completely incontinent.
I don't know how he does it, but he is in a strangely good mood most of the time. We have just finished redoing all his legal stuff from wills, powers of atty., etc., etc., so he is pretty relaxed about that. I have cleaned out and am selling his old house after a bunch of repairs, so that is almost off his plate. He stays active mentally, so he loves it when I bring barbecue over to him (verboten at his joint because of the onions and spices) and we have a nice chat. If I cut up his food, he can spear it, so he feels pretty good about that.
Mom.... well Mom is starting to check out mentally. She has a lot of maladies that old folks have in her 80+ years, but her mental faculties just aren't holding up. In a weird way, this works well for my Dad as he says "I can't leave yet, someone has to take of the old woman" and he makes sure she takes her medicines, goes to her balance classes, makes her doctors appts. and eats. He has a sense of purpose with her around, so it keeps him occupied.

last day. My Dad has seen a lot of that where is now, and he has his fingers crossed that he will go the same way. Thanks for asking, Lew. There are times I feel like the Lone Ranger with all that going on, even though as I have said before I know I am on a well worn path.
I will say one thing, though. I really do understand that old saying "getting old ain't for the weak".
Robert
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Understand, watched my mom slip away over a year and a half period.
She finally cashed her hand at 103.
As I opened your post and read your description of your Dad's skin cancer, I'm thinking "What the Hey", small world.
I'm also recovering from a skin cancer procedure on my cheek
Certainly no where near as serious as your dad's, but still a skin cancer.
Good luck.
Lew
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On Sat, 21 May 2011 22:29:25 -0700, Lew Hodgett wrote:

Me too, Rob. Sorry for your loss. But it seems your dad had a good run. I hope you inherited his longevity genes.
--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw

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Condolences to you and your family. Sounds like your Dad had a good run and left the world the better for his being in it.
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Robatoy wrote:

My condolences, Robatoy. You are fortunate to have had him around for so many years and I am sure that the memories of experiences you enjoyed with him will bring many smiles to your face in the future.
--

dadiOH
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Rob..
Loosing a parent is never easy but I am glad to hear he went quietly in to the night and lived a long life. My deepest sympathies to you, your family, and your mother. I hope you get more time with her.
I lost my father christmas eve in '93. He was only 73. I still want to reach out to talk or show him something I've made because he would have loved it all so much. I still have my mother but these years have been hard on her. She's reached 87 and I hope to keep her a while yet, god willing. I'm grateful for every day we still have.
Respectfully, ~Casper
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That is what has us gobsmacked. Mother took a nasty turn for the worst when her blood thinners went through the roof and started internal bleeding. We rushed to London Emerg (an hour from here) as the only ENT here in Sarnia happened to be away on holidays. (MUCH deserved, the guy works his ass of and we know him well.) The morning after we arrived in London, we were sat down and were told to better make arrangements as mother wasn't going to make it. So we booked a hotel and after making arrangements with friends and notifying family we moved in and waited for 'that' phone call as we tried to get some sleep. The next morning, we get a call, "She's sitting up in bed putting some jam on her toast." But she had taken a serious hit and was quite weak. fast forward>>> We got things under control during the next couple of weeks, and all seemed to be going better with her. A few dips, which kept us hopping. In the meantime, my dad got fewer visits than normal, and he seemed just fine, steady as always, loving the Lindor chocolates we always brought him. Then mother faded again, getting most of our attention.... and during which time, dad decided to sneak out the backdoor.
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Yes, these things happen. It's good that you are not far from your parents. I made too many trips back to Holland in days past ...
As far as Warfarin (Coumadin) is concerned, it's a good but difficult drug. One needs to stay on top of the INR of the bleeding time. Luckily, there are some new machines coming out that make in-home testing more feasible. I'd look into that if you can.
For the story of the invention of Warfarin, and the role of persistent cow farmers and the Wisconsin Alumni Research Foundation (WARF), see this site (probably many more like that, but the story is good, IMNSHO): <http://www.flounder.com/warfarin.htm
--
Best regards
Han
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