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Newspaper 2029
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California .
White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwesternUnited States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Lichtenstein. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.
THIS ONE IS REALLY GOOD Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States
Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.
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Leon wrote:

You forgot what the deficit would be??? 100 Trillion? More like 500
--
"You can lead them to LINUX
but you can't make them THINK"
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evodawg wrote:

500 Brazillion?
--
Morris Dovey
DeSoto Solar
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Morris Dovey wrote:

That's pesos. What is it in real money (i.e., Canadian).
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Canadian money, Looney Toon ey?
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Morris Dovey wrote:

That's a lot of wax.
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Thanks. Now I get to spend the next 1/2 hour cleaning my desk, keyboard and monitor.
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Missing:
SketchUp 23 has been released finally making it somewhat useful to those who want to do more than just play with crayons.
The 220 volt vs 110 volt discussions has finally driven the makers of electricity to the point that they are now only offering power tools at 165 volt. 55 Hz. Universal motors are now outlawed as the carbon dust from the brushes have caused a global temperature increase of 0.00000023 degrees K.
Dust collectors are a thing of the past as all composite components used in hobby-related furniture making have to be bought pre-made by Festomilwaukita.
At an Albertan rest home, former actor Tom Cruise took a bite out of an orderly, still denying he's gay.
The Toronto Maple Leaves, formerly known as the Toronto Maple Leafs, have won the Stanley Cup.
Stephen Hawkins' latest book contains proof that Creationism is in fact the real origin of the Universe.
Former talk show host Oprah Winfrey was finally laid to rest. The 24 pall-bearers were exhausted.
The room-darkening AntiLight bulb's demonstration was a failure when they could not find the switch to turn the damned thing off. The lawsuits by The Drapery Manufacturers Brotherhood are still pending.
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wrote:
Missing:
SketchUp 23 has been released finally making it somewhat useful to those who want to do more than just play with crayons.
You left out, and finally every one has learned to use this simple program, even the die hards. ;~)
The 220 volt vs 110 volt discussions has finally driven the makers of electricity to the point that they are now only offering power tools at 165 volt. 55 Hz. Universal motors are now outlawed as the carbon dust from the brushes have caused a global temperature increase of 0.00000023 degrees K.
And no one really knows if the so called "earth warming" is a bad thing. It seems to have gotten us out of the "IceAge". ;~)
Dust collectors are a thing of the past as all composite components used in hobby-related furniture making have to be bought pre-made by Festomilwaukita.
At an Albertan rest home, former actor Tom Cruise took a bite out of an orderly, still denying he's gay.
I though that had already happened. ;~)
The Toronto Maple Leaves, formerly known as the Toronto Maple Leafs, have won the Stanley Cup.
The WHAT?!!
Former talk show host Oprah Winfrey was finally laid to rest. The 24 pall-bearers were exhausted.
I'll never forget about the time she was caught smuggeling 225 lbs. of CRACK between her legs.
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Robatoy wrote:

Nice.
--

-MIKE-

"Playing is not something I do at night, it's my function in life"
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Picking nits because I'm getting to be a grumpy old fart, and no offense intended but, there are no degrees Kelvin. The units are (only) Kelvins.
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On Wed, 8 Apr 2009 21:49:39 -0700 (PDT), Dan Major

So a "Kelvin" is a unit of temperature that is the same size as a Celsius degree? How about the measurement of absolute temperature using a unit that is the same size as a Farenheit degree. Is that measured in Rankines or in R?
If the Kelvin is a unit of temperature, then it should be syntactically correct, although a little weird to mix units/scales, to say that water boils (under standard conditions) 100K above 0C, or even weirder, that it boils 100K above 32F.
Tom Veatch Wichita, KS USA
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Tom Veatch wrote:

You're making my head hurt. Under those conditions it boils at 373.15K.
--
Morris Dovey
DeSoto Solar
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wrote:

Yep. And since a Celsius degree is the same size as a Kelvin unit, water boils 100K above 0C (273.15K). Or to put into woodworking terms, if you have a shelf 3 feet above the floor and a second shelf 4 feet above the floor, it is syntactically correct to say the second shelf is .3048 meters above the first, even though the shelf locations are specified using feet.
It's just that I'm from the old school where Kelvin was the name of a temperature scale, like Celsius and Farenheit. This is my first exposure to the idea of Kelvin as a unit of measure, like feet or meters, rather than the name of a scale/measurement system like English or Metric.
Tom Veatch Wichita, KS USA
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Tom Veatch wrote:

Unices have 'units' - but recently someone in another newsgroup shared a link to this free units conversion gem for Windows:
http://joshmadison.com/article/convert-for-windows
which seems to work well.
I keep hoping to see units incorporated into calculators, but that may be asking too much...
--
Morris Dovey
DeSoto Solar
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Morris Dovey wrote:

Google does conversions nicely. Google "100 furlongs per fortnight in cubits per decade" for example.
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wrote:

Could be a long wait. There are so many possible choices of units that covering the general engineering case could make for a very complicated input system. Especially if you try to incorporate derived units beyond basic Force and Length measurements. If/when it happens it'll probably appear first for very specialized applications. Even then, somebody would probably be flaming it because it didn't offer a choice to enter stress or pressure in Stones per Square Cubit or something equally obtuse.
A hand held calculator that could handle calculations with a mix of common units would be nice. Of course, if we all went completely to SI units for everything, it would make things simpler. But a lot of folks, including me, have a hard time giving up pounds, gallons, feet, inches, yards, miles, etc. Depends on what you're accustomed to and comfortable with. I can visualize 1/2 inch more readily than 12.5 mm even though a millimeter is as convenient and useful a measurement in woodworking as 1/16 inch. Likewise, 1 HP means more to me than does 3/4 kilowatt.
Interesting that in the English/Imperial system, historically at least, Force (pound) is basic and Mass (slug or poundal) is derived while in the SI systems, CGS or MKS, Mass (gram or kilogram) is basic and Force (dyne or Newton) is derived.
Tom Veatch Wichita, KS USA
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Morris Dovey wrote:

I'm reminded of my first day in physics class when the prof announced, "Lady and gentlemen (My class contained the first women in engineering school that year. My how times have changed), I will be giving several exams through out the quarter.
The answer to every question asked by these exams will be "1" along with the appropriate units".
Your job will be to define the 'appropriate units'.
Lew
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Tom Veatch wrote:

Probably so. I recently wrote a software simulator to model the fluidyne engines I've been working on. I struggled with units and finally decided to allow all the units I might want to use. For example, temperatures can be suffixed with C, F, or K - with K as the default. The input routine converts C and F values to K and ensures that the result isn't negative before passing it to the application. For pressure, length, area, volume, and temperature (what I was working with as inputs) it's a nice convenience.

It is interesting, and I'd be inclined to guess that this has to do with what people felt comfortable with when faced with the task of setting up reproducible standards...
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Morris Dovey
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Morris Dovey wrote:

There's the story about the engineer and the mathematician, who both know how to drink from a cup, being confronted by a water fountain.
The engineer studies the problem for a moment, bends over, and has a nice refreshing drink. The mathematician studies the problem and fills his cup.
The different solutions come from their training: The engineer is taught to solve new problems directly, while the the mathematician is taught to reduce new problems to ones that have already been solved.
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