O/T: Perks of Reaching 50 and Beyond

From some one who should know.
Enjoy
Lew
=================================== Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading towards 70!
01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
02. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
03. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
04. People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?
05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
07. Things you buy now won't wear out.
08. You can eat supper at 4 pm.
09. You can live without sex but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15 . Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list.
And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience.
Forward this to everyone you can remember right now!
And Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
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Sometimes they are amazed I can walk to the mailbox.

And 9 am ...

Well, not always ....

Out of tune and hum the bits you can't remember ... .

And have been for a decade or two ...

Or they're dead ... :(

Is five manageable?

What list?
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And now that I'm turning 55 in a few days, my wife finally has let me buy that goddam motorcycle that I've been missing for the last 30 years.
Whoooooeeee!
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scritch wrote:

Ah yes, the three M's of mid-life: mustache, motorcycle, and mistress. Always felt cheated that all I could muster was the mustache.     grumble,     jo4hn
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"jo4hn" wrote:

Way back when I was about 20, my fraternity brother would ponder the some of the things he wanted to do before he died:
1) Hunt Kodiak bear. 2) Lay on the beach under the shade of a palm tree on some South Pacific island and sip cold drinks served by scantly clad girls. 3)Run barefooted over an endless field of naked women's breasts. 4) Perform cunninglus.
Last time I asked, he still hadn't hunted Kodiak bear yet.
Lew
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On Mon, 25 May 2009 04:04:07 GMT, the infamous "Lew Hodgett"

Where'd he find #3? My next vacation is THERE!
LJ, who turned 56 in August.
--
The only reason I would take up exercising is
so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
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"Larry Jaques" wrote:

He didn't tell and I forgot to ask.
Lew
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On Sun, 25 Oct 2009 07:50:10 -0700, the infamous "Lew Hodgett"

Acid trip in Thailand during 'Nam?
--
Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight
very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands.
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Probably hoping you'll kill yourself so she can get someone younger!
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Might be prudent for him to check if his life insurance as been increased recently.
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On Sun, 24 May 2009 20:22:18 -0700, scritch wrote:

I've got mine trained. She only complains when I have more than 1 motorcycle at a time :-).
--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw

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Larry Blanchard wrote,on my timestamp of 26/05/2009 1:44 AM:

You lucky sod! :B)
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Passed my bike test at the glorious age of 59, just a few weeks after her in doors passed hers.
We are founder members of The Old Fa*ts Motor Bike Club. We take trips out with stupid big grins on our faces and when we get back we try to remember where we've been and who we are.
Great fun
Hope you enjoy your biking as much as we do.
PS Her indoors has just told me she's not a member of the OFMBC. Now I don't know who I go riding with!!
--
Alan
Retired
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