Last night I was having sex with my 68 year old husband when suddenly I heard a loud pop sound inside his body. Immediately he stopped humping on me, and became very still on top of my body. I found it real difficult to get him off of me, but I finally managed to roll him off of me.
At first I thought he was just drunk and needed a little soothing. I rubbed his body but he did not react. I then laid my head on his chest and noticed his heart was not beating. I knew immediately his heart had collapsed.
I quickly ran to the kitchen and grabbed a pot and began to boil some water. Then I took a heavy cast iron frying pan to the bedroom, and began beating it against his chest. I did this for a half hour, but by that time I was completely exhausted and stopped. I still could not hear his heart beating. I knew that the boiling water was my last hope so I quickly ran and got the water, a sharp butcher knife, and sliced open his chest. Then I poured the boiling water into the hole and on to his heart.
This did not work either, so I knew it was best to just let him rest. I laid down next to him and went to sleep. When I woke up this morning, he was stiff and still had no heart beat. Once again I beat on his chest for almost one hour with the frying pan, but it did no good.
I have run out of ideas. What else can I do to fix his collapsed heart? Please tell me quickly, because today is his turn to do the dishes, and he is supposed to mow the lawn today too.