I may attempt to murder a gopher ... I just might stoop to that level (so help me God)

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On Fri, 29 Nov 2013 21:18:07 -0800, Todd wrote:

Don't have cats; but, I was wondering a mechanical thing.
If I exhaust gas them out, how do you connect the exhaust pipe to a 2" pool vacuum hose without melting the hose?
Any suggestions for a cheap and already available fitting?
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On 11/29/2013 09:37 PM, Danny D'Amico wrote:

Borrow some poo from the neighbor's litter box.
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Does that mean he has to return it later?
This is how kids get in trouble.
They start of saying to a classmate, "Can I borrow a sheet of paper", when they have no intention of returning it, and the lender has no expectation of getting it back.
Later they borrow a car from car dealer's parking lot.
Then they borrow 50,000 from the armored car guard.
And they figure they're borrowing, not stealing so it's all right.
Danny, be up front and set a good example for your kids. Tell the people with the cat you want the poo for keeps. No backsies.
This way they won't grow up to be armored car robbers.
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On 11/30/2013 12:18 AM, micky wrote:

Hi Micky,
Still chuckling at the idea that the neighbor would want his, sorry her, cat s--- back.
"Excuse me good neighbor, but I have finished with your cat s--- and would like to return it. I have microwaved it to resume it to its original steaming state. What??? Why are all my their gophers suddenly in your yard? No idea what so ever. None I say. Hog tie me and call me ... Here is your cat poo back. Bye."
-T
Golf with Stormin' in eternity can't be all that bad, can it?
The gophers in the next yard thing actually happened to my sister's neighbors after a good helping of cat s--- down their holes. She is single and did not have to borrow any.
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On 11/30/2013 4:17 AM, Todd wrote:

needs help as a greenskeeper? We can spend eternity chasing gophers, and waking up for groundhog day, repeatedly.
Ah, that could make for a fun movie.
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wrote:

The they borrow $17,000,000,000,000.00 from their unborn children. But that's OK, because they can be killed before they have to pay. Someone else's children can pay.

...or Democrats.
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On 11/30/2013 12:18 AM, Todd wrote:

I know if I lived in a neighborhood where people crammed catshit in my home and left, I'd be sure to move.
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 05:10:28 +0000 (UTC), Danny D'Amico

Next is the C4 ;-)
BTW the chemical trick is bleach and ammonia but run like hell. It is real WMD. (chlorine gas) along with a bunch of other nasties
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 00:19:50 -0500, gfretwell wrote:

I tried that already!
http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3668/11125640846_9fe016e77b_o.jpg
Didn't work.
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On 11/30/2013 12:35 AM, Danny D'Amico wrote:

fusee" stuffed into the hole, and then back fill with rocks and dirt.
Firearm and hollow points has such a much more satisfying feel to it.
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 08:07:50 -0500, Stormin Mormon wrote:

Can a road flare burn without air?
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 16:52:17 +0000 (UTC), Danny D'Amico

Sure. They'll burn underwater, once struck.
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On 11/30/2013 11:52 AM, Danny D'Amico wrote:

etc. Well, the old round red ones with the black phosphorous lighter on the end, did. Not sure what's sold these days.
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 09:07:13 -0800, Oren wrote:

Thanks for finding that. I like his simple answer. He stuck the garden hose onto the tailpipe with aluminum foil.
I could have done without the lullaby though ...
BTW, my (California emissions) car runs pretty cleanly, so, I hope the carbon dioxide does as much work as the carbon monoxide in bothering them out of the area.
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 12:22:33 -0500, Stormin Mormon wrote:

OK. Well, I like that idea because I don't necessarily want to kill them. I just want them to go away.
Perhaps the road-flare smoke will be distasteful to them.
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On 11/30/2013 1:15 PM, Danny D'Amico wrote:

Have you considered hiring a color blind interior decorator, and use an insullation blower to blow shred wall paper into their tunnels? I'd start with green, orange, and purple.
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On 11/30/2013 01:45 PM, Stormin Mormon wrote:

That would only drive the gophers out if they were gay.
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On 11/30/2013 4:30 PM, Butch wrote:

up with such a scheme?
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 10:59:05 -0800, Oren wrote:

I am starting "nice", so, today, I turned on the water in two locations. I'm shocked that the water has been running, full force, for two hours and it hasn't even come *out* of the hole yet!
Gotta go shoppin' with my grandkids, but wow, the ground sure has a huge capacity to soak up water by the tens of gallons without spilling out of the holes.
Hole #1:
http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3671/11138156314_348ce7a243_o.gif
Hole #2:
http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7438/11138121746_cff5369e74_o.gif
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On Sat, 30 Nov 2013 19:50:55 +0000, Danny D'Amico wrote:

After about 4 hours under the hose, the water started seeping out of concrete cracks in the retaining walls, steps, and even the driveway below the lawn.
So, I think I pretty much flooded the gopher's caverns; however, I don't see what I did as being all that different than a good heavy California rainstorm.
I'll let you know if the 4-hour flood has made the gopher into a Noah, to pack up and leave for dry ground. Tomorrow I'll look for fresh mounds.
I'm hoping the water treatment worked. I'm amazed, even after four hours, no water showed up on top of the ground. It only seeped out below grade about 4 feet vertically below where I flooded and about ten or twenty feet away horizontally.
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