He Never Warned Us About the Dangers

When I took woodshop in High School they always warned us about getting our fingers too close to the saw blade on any power saw we used. I learned quickly to keep my fingers away as far as possible. They also cautioned us about having loose clothing when we operated power tools. And of course we all learned to wear safety glasses when using any tool. Throughout my life since High School I have practiced these basic principles, whenever I use a power tool. I have never had an accident until this past July. Actually it was the fourth of July, and my wife and I planned to go see the fireworks that evening. I was determined to hang the new bedroom door, and was rushing because it would soon be time for fireworks. Little did I know that I'd end up in the hospital during the fireworks display.
It went something like this. I was sawing off the bottom of the door when my wife suddenly came rushing toward me. She told me that our dog was in heat, and stated that it excited her to see the dog so worked up, and went on to say "it must be contagious". I asked her what exactly she was trying to tell me, when she reached over and unzipped my pants. I knew right away that she too was in heat.
Wanting to finish sawing off the door, I told her to get undressed and crawl in bed, and I'd be with her in a minute or two. She couldn't wait. She reached into my pants and flung our my cock, just as my saw reached the end of the door. That's when the accident occurred. I felt severe pain as I saw my cock hit the wall, along with a large amount of blood. I looked down and realized my cock was no longer part of my body. That's when I went into shock, and do not recall anything until I awoke in the hospital, many hours later. That is also when I got the dreaded news. My cock was damaged so badly that it could not be saved.
This has changed my whole life. I angrily blamed my High School shop teacher, because after all those warnings about keeping fingers away, and wearing safety glasses, never once did he warn us about keeping our cock in our pants while operating a power saw. To add insult to injury, my wife just told me she wants a divorce. She just told me today that she left her last husband after he pointed a sawed off shotgun at her. Now, as she put it "I now got another husband with a sawed off gun".
Speaking of guns. After I fully recover from this, I am going to look up my wifes ex-husband, along with his gun. I am going to hire him to go after my shop teacher and teach him a thing or two. However, this may not be possible since I was recently told that he died. Apparently he bled to death in shop class, a few years after I graduated, and from what I heard, his body was discovered after school hours, by the school principal, along with my female english teacher, and both were undressed.
I hope you found this story shocking, and learned to never let your cock out of your pants while running a power tool. I suppose you are wondering if this story is true. Well, I am not sure myself. You see, my memory has sort of faded since the accident. To answer that question, I'd have to unzip my pants and take a look for myself. But you see, I can't do that right now, because I'm using my computer, which is a power tool. I am also wearing some real foggy safety glasses which make it rather hard to see.
So, I am going to leave, and leave you with this little tidbit. I thank my english teacher for allowing me to write this, and thank my shop teacher that I still have ten fingers to type with.
At the same time, I continue to cuss at the son of a bitch that didn't clean these safety glasses the last time they used them.
SAFETY FIRST (even during sex).
Ryan (The mad typist)
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On Mon, 30 Aug 2004 02:07:40 -0500, mad-typist@_Ask_Mom_.com wrote:

Heh! Pretty good....
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Strange. Same exact thing happened to me, too, but mine broke the blade. My wife must be hotter than your wife.
On Mon, 30 Aug 2004 02:07:40 -0500 mad-typist@_Ask_Mom_.com wrote :

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His wife is pretty hot, but she doesn't moan like your wife does.
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