Guns

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It's called thinking outside the box. I can just imagine you stranded on a desert island hunting for matches.
--
On the topic of mobile phones:
Anything bigger than 4 inches is getting into the region where most people would have difficulty holding and using the device comfortably -- Callum Kerr, 2013.
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On Tuesday, July 26, 2016 at 1:58:07 PM UTC-5, RonNNN wrote:

only let him play with dolls and never got a chance to be one of the boys playing 'cops and robbers' or 'cowboys and Indians.'
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Playing with guns is childish. Cars it what real people get excited about.
--
I got the strangest recording when I called the phone company the other day.
It said, "You have been connected to the correct department on the first try. This is against company policy. Please hang up and redial."
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On 26/07/2016 21:02, ItsJoanNotJoann wrote:

Indians. It's a game with *pretend weapons*.
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Water pistols, catapults, bows and arrows, make your own weapons.
--
23% of all photocopier faults worldwide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their buttocks.

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On 26/07/2016 21:34, James Wilkinson wrote:

Great for pinging people bending over (they sting). Their reaction was priceless Got a few clips round the ear for that :-)
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If you got one in the ear did you get a clip round your butt?
--
63% of men have had sex in the shower.
The other 37% have never been to prison.
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On 26/07/2016 19:58, RonNNN wrote:

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Because nobody bothers sticking to standards, there are several dozen types of screwdriver. However with a gun you only need a few.
--
What happens when you stick your hand in a jar of jelly beans?
The black ones steal your watch and rings.
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On Tuesday, July 26, 2016 at 3:18:55 PM UTC-4, James Wilkinson wrote:

We've probably got more than 30 screwdrivers in every size from "need to use a loupe to see the screw head" to "this thing really is a pry bar, isn't it?" If you count driver bits for the drill, it's probably more like 100.
Sounds like we need to buy a few more guns, just for parity.
Cindy Hamilton
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Guns don't have so many uses.
--
How do you titillate an ocelot?
Oscillate its titalot.
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On 26/07/2016 19:47, Cindy Hamilton wrote:

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If you can't link the two things together, there is no hope for you.
--
I just sent my lawyer something for his birthday. Unfortunately, he wasn't home when it went off.

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You've snipped it.
--
TV takes over your life when you could be doing useful things like smoking crack and stealing car stereos.

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On 7/26/2016 11:17 AM, James Wilkinson wrote:

The anti-American anti-gun troll is back. What's the matter Jamie, had a boring week and no friends to keep you occupied? I can see why.
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At least I haven't shot them all.
--
An old black-and-white photograph of a man milking a cow was sent to a photo-finishing company.
The man was sitting behind the cow, and all that was visible of him were his legs and feet.
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None, because they don't have guns. I don't consider myself that crazy, but if I had a gun, I would have shot a few folk with it that have pissed me off. That's why I'd never own one.
--
When they found out their wives were attending a sex-toy party,
the husbands refused to go and pick them up,
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Per James Wilkinson:

Bunch of years ago, I stopped pedaling my bike to work in city traffic when a friend's practice of carrying a loaded .44 magnum in the gas tank pouch on his motorcycle started to sound reasonable to me.
--
Pete Cresswell

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In a car I find it enough to blast the horn at idiots, after missing them by as small a margin as possible.
--
Recent medical journals are now advising doctors that, should they discover a patient has an AOL account, they should refrain from telling the patient they have sugar in their urine.
Studies show these people go home and piss on their cornflakes.
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On Saturday, July 30, 2016 at 11:31:58 AM UTC-4, James Wilkinson wrote:

So, because you're mentally unbalanced, nobody can have a gun. Is that it?
Cindy Hamilton
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