Do you do?

My favourite peeve with answering machines is people who won't leave a message but simply say "Call me." I provide a machine so they can give me something to work with so that my call to them isn't a waste of time for all of us, especially if they have an answer machine and we both just call back and forth doing nothing but leaving "call me" messages.

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The proper zippy reply for this one is, "Only when I'm awake."

-Frank

Reply to
Frank Warner

Are Bears Catholic ?

Reply to
Rudy

I've had dealings with an obtuse local locksmith who has my phone number listed at a business website. Every couple of months I get a call for his services and in spite of my talking to the locksmith and emailing and faxing him, the error has not been corrected. Another great business man.

I'd tell all subsequent callers that ..."sorry, I'm out of business. Instead call (insert another locksmith's phone number)...he can help you."

Reply to
Charlie Darwin

I think the modern version is- Does the Pope's bear shit in the Vatican? -----

- gpsman

Reply to
gpsman

Pfft. Some customers you don't want. Those are usually the stupid.

I had a great comeback: 1.5-10 times my usual fee, or whatever they had in their account, plus $100.

Stupid surcharge. -----

- gpsman

Reply to
gpsman

Chris,

It sounds like you have been working with the public much too long. You and I should both find different jobs.

Colbyt

Reply to
Colbyt

But you can return the favor by reporting that you heard he is out of business due to problems with the government.

Lou

Reply to
LouB

Is it an actual website or just one of those business directory sites that just leech information?

My buddy has had a problem with google for a long time. They have a business locater thing. His business is located in a commercial space in the same town as where his parents live. His parents are elderly and in ill health and it is clearly a residence but lots of sales people show up banging on his parents door to make cold sales calls because they got the information from google. My friend spent over six months before an actual person from google contacted him. The person said they would fix it but he had to prove to them that they were in error. He submitted lots of information and they still haven't fixed their error and won't respond.

Reply to
George

Since he has a phone number he should ask for the legal dept as well as giving google lots of free bad publicity.

Reply to
LouB

Frank wrote in news: snipped-for-privacy@y10g2000prc.googlegroups.com:

Give subsequent callers a quote..."49.95 plus a pair of our wife's panties. 10% discount if she's in heat."

Reply to
Red Green

"our" wife's.... LOL

Reply to
G. Morgan

G. Morgan wrote in news: snipped-for-privacy@mypost.invalid:

a typo...but maybe a good one :-)

Reply to
Red Green

Unless the web site in question belongs to the locksmith, you are talking to the wrong person. Contact the sysadmin at the web site that is showing the wrong number, and tell them one of their listed companies made a typo, and that YOU own the number and want it removed. You can even supply him with the correct number, if you happen to know it. Yes, the idiot locksmith in the listing should have had it corrected, but since he won't, you can either fix the problem yourself, or deal with the irritation.

-- aem sends...

Reply to
aemeijers

Good advice!

Reply to
LouB

That's just about the snotty level I'm seeking. You're hired!

Reply to
Stormin Mormon

Years ago, my parents home phone was a couple digits away from TWO totally different hardware stores. We'd get calls for one hardware, or the other. I finally stopped telling folks they dialed the wrong number. Whatever it was they wanted, we had five or six in stock, and choice of colors. Just come in and ask for Fred.

Reply to
Stormin Mormon

Jesus had some pretty zippy answers. "Neither do I tell thee" and things like that. He sure is a good role model.

Reply to
Stormin Mormon

Now, that's the spirit. Blame the government.

Gerbil cage? Was it a combination lock?

Reply to
Stormin Mormon

It turned out to be a woman whose father had died. She had the combination, but was having trouble opening Dad's safe. I did return the call the next morning, and she had got the safe open.

Reply to
Stormin Mormon

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