Smart squash bugs

My daily (sometimes twice daily) quest to rid the world of squash bugs consists of wetting the plants, snatching those little smelly suckers as they climb up the stalk and squashing them (pee-u...) in my fingers. I daily inspect the underside of each leaf looking for eggs, which is in the past where they lay them.
Well, they have gotten smart now too and are laying them on the stalks, not the leaves, thus they are still around but I've not found any eggs. Dang, even the bugs are getting smarter. What's up with that?
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Yes, we are on to you, you smelly human. You will never find all our eggs. You think you are funny, squashing us squash bugs. We are squash bugs because we like squash, not because we like to or are supposed to get squashed. You'll get yours!
-- Frasik
B.A. Gourd Eating, Farmer College 1999 M.S. Zucchini Anatomy, Farmer College 2000 Ph.D. Plaguing Humanity, Coconut University 2003
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